As I’m sitting in a rocking chair, feeling the chilly October breeze coming from outside, I feel so grounded now, as I’m in the right place at the right time. I feel so peaceful, feeling enough, light, worthy, loved. This is the feeling that hits me from time to time. In those moments, a tinyContinue reading “Loving What Is”

Parts of Me is a series of essays where I explore all the different parts of myself. Looking into good sides, and less-than-good sides. I’m shining a light on the ones that have been loud, listening to what they have to say. I’m also gently inviting other parts who were sitting quietly in the backstageContinue reading “Parts of me (Part 2)”

I was self-sabotaged many times by the perfectionist in me, I almost faked an illness a year ago so I don’t have to travel and officiate the wedding of the two very important people in my life. I was scared that I’d lose my voice in the middle of the ceremony, that my anxiety andContinue reading “Parts of me (Part 1)”

I was debating if I should start a brand new Instagram account for way too long. It felt as necessary, as much needed online presence, as a form of an ID – to let people get to know me through witty captions, interesting stories, and tastefully edited photos. All while it also felt daunting, scary,Continue reading “(Online) Version of Me”

I was turning 30 in just 4 days, and I still had the smile I hated; smile I was hiding away every time someone would snap a photo of me. It’s not an easy task to hide a smile when I would get so excited or being over the moon. Every time a thought (orContinue reading “It’s Hard Not to Smile Now”

Spinning in circles within my self-imposed limits and fears, I’ve decided to crack myself open, and be vulnerable here in this blog. Like an open book. Brené Brown said “shame cannot survive being spoken.. and being met with empathy. So, I feel called to do exactly that. I’ll type about it; and try to meetContinue reading “Journey to Home”

As usual, I woke up before sunrise and as I’m brewing the coffee, this time, I decided to brew just enough for one cup. He’s not getting a coffee in bed this morning. That’s my way of showing that I’m hurtting again by another broken promise. He said he will come home before midnight. HeContinue reading “Unconditional Coffee in Bed”

Who am I? What do I like? What am I afraid of? What makes my heart sing? What makes me scared? What makes me feel free? What am I running away from?  I remember, it must have been around the age of 10, when I became awake. I remember vividly how I just felt oneContinue reading “Who is Nikola?”